Feb. 16th, 2010

agentotter: (one of those days)
Look, fandom. I think we need to have a talk. I mean, it's all well and good that you like what you like and you have money to burn and everything, but this? I'm sorry. This is fucking ridiculous.

I'd understand you if this were for charity, fandom. But it isn't. It's for somebody's profit. And come on, fandom. You and I both know that you have a great imagination. Remember that time you wrote that thing with the orgy and the tentacles? That was great, and I never would've thought to turn Zelenka into an octopimaid. So what you could do is, see, you could pay $6.00 for one of these at your local Hot Topic or sporting goods store or whatever. And then you could pretend that John Sheppard wore it on various adventures to planets that look strangely like British Columbia. You could pretend so fiercely that when you sniff your wristband, rather than new-from-the-factory smell, you would swear you detect the aroma of Joe Flanigan's sweat.

And then all of you who were willing to spend that kind of obscene amount of money on a Nike wristband whose actual production costs probably total about 20 cents (since it was probably crafted by five-year-old factory workers) could take that money and donate it to a worthy cause. I'll suggest a few of which The Flan and the imaginary people of Atlantis would no doubt approve: Doctors Without Borders, Space Camp Scholarship Fund, Earth and Space Foundation, My Bank Account.

Oops, that last one just slipped in there. Honest.

Look, I totally get it. I don't wanna come all up in here and get on my high horse and everything about people spending their money the way they want to spend it, even if that way is stupid. I can't exactly claim not to have spent money on fandom that would've done me a lot more good in my savings account. I'm just trying to help you out here, fandom. Maybe you should get into prop-making instead, and make your own replicas, and just have the Flan touch them for you on your next convention trip to imbue them with his magical powers. (Your hair may never be the same.) Or you could just get a wristband and tell people it's screen-worn, and they'll never be the wiser. It's like how I have this scar on my hand from a rogue microwave oven. I tell people it's from the time I got into a bare-knuckle fistfight. With a mountain lion.

Don't get me wrong: there's plenty of awesome stuff up there and really, there's no way that owning Ronon's blaster will not make you more of a GQMF than you already were. Some of the stuff they're selling on here is super-sweet and if I had extra money lying around, I'd probably be redecorating my room with concept art right now.

But come on. A wristband. For $500+. This isn't a sign that that's just an awesome prop item. That's a sign that fandom sometimes lets its fetishism get out of control.

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agentotter

December 2010

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